14 posts tagged “images”
Maybe I could word it up as retribution or avengement...but as much as I don't trust to happenstance it got me to belief it existed. It is there, clinging to something I call the past. The old angst went away as swiftly as it could, though I forgot to wash it off resulting a leftover glow, and it got reignited back. Sublime..Yes the eve of Raya was eventful, the morning after papi set out for Kedah (apologies again..) I deliberated on staying mellow throughout the whole day. But like he always said I am a strong girl, so the boundaries were pushed and I succeeded in masking a nonchalant mood in front of everyone (but I failed to impress a particular person, he knows me through and through) and it got me a few plus points after that. Great times, good vibes. (I got ever so bashful 2-year-old cousin smitten to me) The old tradition continues, members expanding, youths growing and the adults started to grey. Phenomenal. After break fast the family gathered around for group prayers and it got me there. That's it. Shot me right there. Let the heart fiddle with my feelings and boy, I was intoxicated. (of what I am not really sure of) Headed to the museum worthy mall, pranced around laughing and giggling like an overexcited dressed up wannabe (with a blistered feet). Passe. Tired of the faux act, slept at the mall (yes on the floor like a freaking beggar) and woke up hearing the sound of fire-crackin'. Played GTA with the XY cousins, after many failed attempts at the kitchen. (EPIC FAIL) Home sweet home an hour after midnight with the impasse' feeling..and wet-faced. Chatboxes running between me and the guy #1, fag friend and guy #2. Sad occurence with guy #2, another session of exchanging sad notions between both of us, sad vibes, sad endings. Apologies... Guy 1# and fag friend made quite an attempt to faze me. I remain unfazed.
But I was at least a bit bemused after 3 am thanks to guy #1.
It's official. I'm 17. So as to say I should feel euphoric, well not so. Again, it happened at such ungodly hour. Inspirations injecting in...at times when the blues are kicking in. Not smashing at all. (insert clicking noise) Daydreaming I was all about these days, and its funny that everytime it happens it left me feeling blank and...distorted. Ya dig? Yknow it ain't your fault if you ain't catching my drift...but tellin' you one thing, things I daydream about ain't far fetched at all. Embarasses me to the point that I humiliated myself. I hate feeling embarassed. (I'm not shy though, mind you!) Good God. I'm ending this chapter. Chronicles of me and the previous lover seems to meet its end soon. Still...never fails to make me ge all agitated everytime a conversation is brought upon between us. Him and his sour mouth. Me and my angry self. Or the other way around. Bad combination. Sorry for being such a nuisance boy, but we missed it. Ain't never gonna click. But the society seems to not get it...chemistry is important ya know? Them blaming me...like they know everything. Tsk tsk? But those league of self-absorbed beings ain't gonna shatter me any bit. Takes more than that to do so. Lesson learnt folks, think wisely before making decisions! Some things may be good when you first get your hands on it, but it ain't staying good as gold forever. Lucky you if it does. God bless.
Countdown to test and of course this is what I have been doing..si.
Here's what I need (remedy!)
1. Long khalwah moments with ya Rabbi
2. Total phone shutdown (pfft)
3. Total no-digit giving
4. Reshuffling the Science bibles
5. Growing the locks (ugly)
6. A bubble skirt
7. A sequin tube
8. A leopard/cheetah/zebra printed flats
9. A mini-tube dress
10. Lots of cash. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YES! I am in a middle of a mess. Dawdling and fumbling with many sort of tweedledums and tweedledees. Oh lord..I am so in the Valley of Sad City this month..(snort, Georgina Nicholson alert..) The fact that NOTHING actually cheered me up annoys me more..(oh god am I being serious..PMS mood probably) I'm starting to hate extra-classes. I was in a deep anger (jealousy) yesterday and deep annoyed (really was) 4 days before. Looming over the bad locks...I am one piece of angry A-hole. (Don't you dare come near me!)
100% A-hole/Bitch Month.
(I agree..PMS inclusive, twice this month, oh for the love of everything sane in this world)
On a supposedly tight schedule, (supposedly!) oh f-off. All set, poladroiding all day. Rants on going with the freak, everyday, 24/7. (what the hell man?) Giving him an impression of a stuck up loner, (am one indeed) oh fuck the world man, who cares! Uzair is no longer mine so why bother about others. I need to get a griiiiiiiiiiiip.
*zero inspiration for an hour*
Post-Friday/Saturday Rants;
Oh dear god..your expression was priceless. (the stares were very much appreciated..tqvm) As I flunked the seat next to you and joined the other brigade..torture. A great torture to your music-washed soul huh? Z was being a great tuiton mate for the day. (gasp..revelation of truth, MunFai get ready!) A was being grumpy than usual, but hey gentlemen he was. Lord..don't make me start on H. Countless time of ruffling and shuffling my hair..(me being the imaginary dog) When asked on why the need of him playing with my hair..the only way to stop (it seems) is to shave em hair bald. (Oh great, did he forget hijab?) In the meantime, Add Maths was fun and loved...trust J to make mothereffed faces and shove it to me (yuck!) God..that kissing noise, I wish I have 90v battery with me (yes, imagining) and stuck it in his mouth. Such pretty face but a wasted sperm, indeed. Care not to deny the truth, I love my tuition boys. (thanks for the prepaid H) :-) Saturday? Sinful. Made ma scorned and all boiled up. A poladriod day. An unproductive day. Mothereff. I hate that day. Apart from that small spring cleaning. I gave hope to D. He thinks he's back in the game. Dialled my digits, allowed a mere 10 minutes call. I'm nice. H was being as awesome as ever. Dialled, entertained, hung up as phone died (shssh!) and left the story in-between. Well I guess the day was spent off texting the freak. Sinful. I need my testoterones (sp?) hormones! Give it back to me! My uglier days! My nerd days! Kicks arse man. Till then, I need a serious bedgasm. (scoffs)
Life is bitchin', si? Cut myself some slack by having a short movie-marathon while indulging trans-fat, from 2 am till quarter to 5. Pop's busy with his workloads, so after tuition he slopped back in slumber. Where was I...ah yes, was chillin' like nobody's business watching Wild Child and Wanted (yes, bad combination) ..then I was too tired, shut the lappie off and dozed. Left me feeling guilty and deceit. (I did not wake up for Subuh..I've been keeping up lately, but damn) Pop went out 6 minutes to 10 telling me that he'll be off first and is pickin' me up later..I expect change of plans, knowing how busy and fickle minded he is. (haha, kiddy) Alas, Monday's school! Have I know inform you that I am absolutely enthralled on the idea of school? OMG, YES! (scoffs) Tis' will kick-arse yeahs, we seniors gonna rock that hell-heavenhole! No. Ain't gonna party hard..I'm thinking of getting to the geek side! (puts on geek glass)
<- Top to bottom:- Sheer black leopard jacket (reserved!), Retro tecnicolor dress (paid!), Turqoise flapper sleeve dress (reserved-cancelled-regretted-snatched by someone!)
Homeworks are left unattained. What? When? How? Je ne sais pas, mianhae. (ouwww multi-language, I like) Where was I? Yes..Chemistry, Biology. 5 papers in total. Any vindications? I for one thinks thats we should finish it (a) formative marks ahoy! you bitch in form of digits..(b) a total faux pas to start the 09' getting trounced from the "Fraternity of Cluster Professuers" ..et (c) then everyone will go, OMG you did it! OMG this and that; it will totally brings up your self-esteem, kinda help on the 1st day impressions too..ha-ha. (okay lame) and (d) who wants to be a goody-goody two shoes? matey, I see a show of hands there! (gasp) In conclusion, Ich interessiere mich nicht! I don't care! (wait, I think I do) Past weeks spent bunking at Grandma's watching Astro that provides no HBO, E! and the likes ended up channelling 555 and 122, and whole lot of German movies there, I am that sad. But anyway, it doesn't prevent me from my daily retail updates! Behold! Due to the atrocious damage done..which resulted much loss of kachings! ($) - nearly RM300 in a week, I thereforth forestall any likings or intentions to attain any fabrications of any sort of...material. (that minus accessories..tantalizing body products..shoes, Ah yes SHOES!) For I now am equipped with a mere RM150! Major shopping pas! Alright matey, I'll refrain myself. (gag!) But considering I am a cheap-ass, go-for-volume brat, I'm proud! A savvy shopper indeed. (Topshop, Zara, Guess long gone indeed, I bid you farewell!)
Listening to Coldplay's tune circa 05', with a mug of Tesco Hot Choc beside, and my bleeping gadget. Having troubles expressing heartfelt gratitude towards em laddates and relatives...oh for the love of god how I treasure my family! Runaway aunt spilledthe beans, ahh yes she realised her pants are on fire! Revealed the known truth, and tadda...she's busted. With a capitol 'B'. Damn kick-arse, my grandpere' is. "Me, my wife and family are longing for Ameena, and don't you worry we won't lock two of em' up and bomb your place and mash your ass." (OW!) Yes, he did say that...ok he didn't. Whichever it was..she ended up getting the greenlight (you stupid camel!) and will be aboard (insyaallah) on the 7th of Nov; same arrival date as le mami and grandmami. How dare she! Blatantly voiced that she'll arrive first..how one lie leads to another, and another. (She=runaway aunt) Ahh forgo that! I don't care, all I want is Ameena and my vintage goodies from America! (and my vanilla body products; don't forget to smell me!) Off the way! Out! Room improvement calls!
On list :- Slick & cotton leggings, black leopard sheer jacket, vintage sling bag, quirky vintage vest, geek glasses, studded heels, more vintage dresses, sequin cape, Tea n' Sympathy goodness, Ikano 1st floor stalls (roflmaomgwtfbbq) AND body&bathworks milk products!